So I was there the other day hanging around when one of my friends started talking about how an emotional void has formed in her life due to her relationship. When I first heard the term, I thought it was a generic word people use when they are doing bad. But it turns out that an emotional void is a real thing and it is a big problem in the modern community.
An emotional void is a state of being emotionally blank. It is caused by the lack of meaningful emotions. Feeling emotionally void is a common problem across the globe. Today, it is further accelerated by the rampant use of social media.
An emotional void of each person can be a subjective matter. If you feel like you have lost your reason to live, chances are you have no more reason to be emotional about anything. If your partner is emotionally unavailable for you, over time you can become emotionally void.
Emotional unavailability is caused by the fear of being vulnerable to others. By not caring about your and other’s emotions, you also tend to create an emotional void on people around you. That’s because you make them feel like they are purposeless hence instigating an emptiness in their mind.
What forms can an emotional void take?
As regarded above, an emotional void is a subjective matter. For different people, the reason and how they perceive it is different. An emotional void can take many forms.
Isolation: Isolation just may be one of the most frequent forms of emotional emptiness. Isolation can be a reason and a symptom as well as a form of emotional voidness.
Lost purpose: This is another form of emotional emptiness. In the modern world, this is typically caused by a busy life without clear directions. At one point in time, anyone can feel they have lost their purpose to live. This comes from realizations that life is not all about making money.
Genuinely uninteresting life: So many people lead uninteresting life. People just live for the sake of it. Most people go to work not because they want to, but because they have to. This lack of interest is itself a form of emotional void.
What causes an emotional void?
There is a strictly scientific reason as to what causes an emotional void. This is related to your brain chemical reward mechanism. There are typically three chemicals that dictate your brain’s mood -Dopamine, Serotine, and Norepinephrine. Each has its purpose. Dopamine releases when we experience pleasure, while the serotine is associated with learning and memory. Norepinephrine controls stress and anxiety levels.
It is safe to say that the absence of these chemicals creates the emotional void we experience. While this may be the scientific backing to the whole process, there is inevitably something beyond just brain chemistry. This has more or less to do with human nature and being aware of it can be important for a healthy and happy living.
To say what causes an emotional void in in terms of daily life:
- Busy life.
- Lack of self-appreciation.
- Lack of appreciation from others.
- Being ignored.
- Feeling left out.
How to know if you are emotionally void?
- You want to be left alone.
- You feel life is meaningless.
- You are not attracted to anyone.
- Absence of happiness.
- You feel like you have to fill your void, typically through addiction to alcohol and drugs.
- You are always bored.
How to recover from an emotional void?
There is a lot of philosophical ways to see an emotional void. In popular western culture, emotional emptiness is seen as something negative while in some eastern cultures and religions like Buddhism and Taoism, emotional emptiness (sunyata) is seen as something positive. That’s because the eastern culture admires not being bothered by emotional states.
Whether you are from the east or west, it would be great if you can get over your emotional emptiness.
Embrace the emptiness
This comes straight from the east and it may just be one of the best ways to cope up with inner emptiness. In eastern cultures, people try to achieve emptiness in their minds. An empty mind is seen as more holy compared to the polluted ones.
As referenced above, what might constitute a negative thing in the west is something people often try to achieve in the east. It is a life’s quest for Buddhist monks. So if you just embrace the emptiness and accept it as an achievement, you will develop a more positive approach towards it.
If you stop seeing emptiness as something bad and instead start seeing it as something pure, you don’t need to be bothered about it. The ball is in your court.
Writing things down
The benefits of writing are something that’s quite researched and made evident throughout the centuries. Writing down things can cure emotional emptiness as it is a form of self-communication. It is a great way to reflect and understands oneself.
As emotional voids can be a result of being alone and feeling that one doesn’t have to communicate with anyone, writing can help fill that gap. There needs to be a bridge between you and the people that you may want to communicate to stop being emotionally void. Writing just might help you cross that bridge.
Light yourself up
(Without them chemicals, obviously.)
Some things can make you happy, some things can give you that dose of dopamine rush that can lighten your day. You know that one thing from childhood that always made you happy. Identify it and try to repeat them.
Is it playing football? Or was it sliding down the stairs? Just do that stupid thing even if you are an adult. Just don’t do it in front of others, that will be awkward.
Finding what specifically gives you joy and doing it is a healthy way to hold yourself together. Those could be small things, those could be stupid things but as long as it makes you happy, it doesn’t matter.
You are feeling emotionless? Here is something that can make you emotional. Open your childhood album, search up movies that you watched as a kid or hear music that made your childhood or my personal favorite, download games you played as a kid and try to play it again. It hits me with a hell lot of nostalgia.
Another way to feed nostalgia is to travel to places that you went as a kid. If it’s a Disney land or an old park, go there. Go to your old school premises or a hotel you used to go to as a kid. So many things can feed you nostalgia and it can cut the emotional void in your mind.
Stop soul searching
A lot of people, most probably early adults wants to determine what they are supposed to do. They think they have some specific purpose on this planet and it is predetermined. These comes straight from our ancient cultures and religions but it is to be evaluated that to what degree is it actually true?
Nobody on this planet is born to do any specific tasks. You are being emotionless and numb not because you are doing the wrong things in life. That’s how life is. There are no well-defined wrong and right things to do. If you are physically strong it doesn’t really mean you should try Olympics or if you are physically weak does not mean you should ignore it. If you want to go to the Olympics, then go for it regardless of any factor given to you by birth.
Stop soul searching, there are no things you are “supposed” to do. Do things you like and stop letting your mind wander around.
Watch an emotional movie
Some movies can work your heart out. Emotional numbness is something that can be treated by doing things that can make you emotional. Watch an emotional movie that might just be one of the best and easiest ways to do it.
First off, watching a movie is an easily accessible option. You can easily get movies via a multitude of online sources (Not vouching for piracy here). You can watch it in the comfort of your phone or laptop without bothering anyone.
An emotional movie doesn’t always have to be a romantic movie with ups and downs. Watch motivational films, comedy films or documentaries. Generally, people associate the word “emotion” with sadness. While it can trigger emotions and help you recover the emotional void, it is rather best you treat your void with positive emotions rather.
An emotional void is a common problem and in most cases it is short-lived. Understanding that emotional void is not a permanent problem can drastically improve your optimism levels to move forward in your life. Emotional voids are caused because the human brain is designed to and can even be a coping mechanism.
There are many ways to deal with emotional emptiness none of which requires extensive use of money or high modifications in your daily routine. So you should let time figure it out and let the day pass. Stay safe and stay healthy.